Our First State Wide Staffing

Well, it's official, we now have a case worker and are ready for the first statewide staffing on September 8, 2009. Statewide staffing is the process of DHS looking at all the adoptive families to see if there are any children who would match the adoptive families. You are only signed up for children that meet your criteria. Once again there is no guarantee that there will be any children that match our criteria. We have broadened our requirements after being advised to do so by our caseworker. We have also looked into the possibility of becoming foster parents and taking an infant from the DHS shelter. We have not made a final decision on this idea. As we understand it is the best way of getting an infant. However, having said that there is also the possibility that the child could be re-unified with the family or that a relative could come in at the 9th hour and take the child. We are not sure we would be able to handle getting attached to a child then have to give it back. So that decision will be for a future date. So for now we are glad to be moving forward. I just learned that my older brother Ezra and his wife Briana will be having a baby next spring. This is Briana's first child. We are very excited for them. So hopefully our family will have 2 new children in the very near future. So once again new Mr. Zimmerman, your family is waiting to meet you, and hoping it will be soon. Hold on we are coming to get you as soon as we figure out where you are.

We are done....sort of!!

We have finally received the official okey dokey that all the paperwork, including my fingerprints have been received by DHS. We are now officially ready to adopt a child. Oh, except that we wait again to be assigned to a Case Worker. We have been told that it could take up to 2 weeks just to get a Case Worker. So for now our prayers are that God will direct us to the best Case Worker for us. I have decided that this process is just one big hurry up and wait. So what is new. I still believe that the special little boy that God has specifically selected for our family is out there and we are so excited to meet him. So to you new Mr. Zimmerman know that your new Mommy and Daddy are ready to meet you, ready to have you as our son and ready to love you with all our heart. My hope is that someday you will read this and know that you were very much loved and very much wanted even before we knew who you were. The Bible says in Jeremiah 1:5 that God knew you before your were ever born and God knew that you would be our son. You are a very special boy and we are very anxious to love you in person. Your new sister Mariah is already talking about how much she wants to see your first steps and all the firsts you will do. She too is ready to meet and ready to love you too. To all of you who wait with us thanks for the support, keep praying and believing and know that the wait will be worth it.

On the Job training

When Melisa and I started the adoption process, she had had 22 years of parenting experience. I, on the other hand, had six years of step-parenting, and none with a new born or infant, which is the desire of our hearts. I didn't go into this with doe-eyed innocence or a Pollyanna outlook. God had to drag me kicking and screaming. There are still pieces of wood under my fingernails where I was clawing the floor to prevent me from welcoming the bundle of joy into our home. That process is for a whole other entry. Today is about the stops and starts and lifted and dashed hopes we've experienced so far. I am not yet a Jedi master. The spiritual master I've been trying to study under recently is Job. The man in the Bible whose reputation is for being dumped on, having everything taken from him, and is also the role model for being blessed more than we can imagine for being faithful and trusting God.
We first considered parenthood when we found out about her cousin's child pregnant and in jail in Nebraska. On her fourth child with years to go on her sentence, having relinquished her right on her previous 3 children, and her sibling full up on kids, we became a possible place to bless her new child with a home and loving environment. She was initially denied admission to the parenting program and we were told it was a high 90% chance to have a kinship adoption. My mother brought a bassinet down, we bought clothes, and told the family of our new addition. She appealed the decision and was granted a place in the program. The rug came out from under our feet and we landed safely but uncomfortably on our backsides. We picked ourselves up and pressed on.
Down the road a piece, Melisa hears about a young girl who is pregnant. Unfortunately, she hears about it through a client and that would jeopardize the job that she values so much, and will enable us to live and share the life we have. Another healthy young child that is just out of our reach .
Melisa's cousin has a daughter who is a foster parent and we met a young boy that she had fostered. It is brought to our attention that he has become eligible for adoption . We grill her cousin on the boy, she raves about how smart he is and how she thinks he will thrive in a stable environment. Melisa gets a twinkle in her eye. I have a little bit of apprehension, but I'm always the doubting Thomas. bWe have already met him and played with him at Rosa's house. He is a cute kid. A little further inquiry and we find out there are some violent episodes we won't expose Mariah too. Another near miss. Job waits the devil gives him boils and God does nothing.
We floated our desires to another couple from church. Find out they adopted and had adoption attorneys they couldn't say enough nice things about. I have to say lawyers have a harsh reputation and to have them gushed about like that made me think they had red capes and shirts with big "S"es on them. The only catch was we were a lot short on the $16,000 they needed to take our case. The perfect solution to our search was just a little bit outside of our price range.
The next in line was to give Catholic Charities a try. They have a halfway house for pregnant teens, and what they heck, I was a Catholic once upon a time in a galaxy far far away. I just crossed my fingers and hoped they didn't ask me to recite a Hail Mary. The paper work was filled out and mailed in near a word, from Catholic Charities or from Heaven above.
Here is the beauty of this story, I know God was faithful to Job. He wound up with twice what he had. He didn't have to do anything but believe in a God that would never leave or forsake him. I am believing that same God that Andrew (what we call the son we are believing for) is out there, and more than that he is on his way into our lives. So bring on the boils, because my son is worth the price, and I serve and believe the same God Job did. My on the Job training continues.

Steven

So the wait continues!

Starting a new month, August arrives and we continue to wait for the next Mr. Zimmerman. I guess I never really expected that we would still be in this process a year after we first thought we would be adopting a baby from Nebraska. I continue to call Teresa at DHS every week to see if by some miracle my fingerprints have been read by the OSBI. I am still wishing they would just take my word for the fact that I don't have any hidden secrets in my past. However, having just said that I know that many children are abused and neglected in DHS custody so I agree with their attempt to make every effort to keep the children safe. But gee the process seems to be so long most days. I did attempt to email the people from our family resource group and did receive a very limited response. I was a little dissappointed by that. Anyway the 2 that I talked to did give me some good pespective on the process. Neither of them have recieved a child yet. One had completed the process and are waiting for a boy 3 years or younger, just like us. There was no child that met that classification available for adoption in the first month after they completed the application process. The other person I spoke with said she felt that her DHS worker who did their home study gave her some good advise and information which made me a little more encouraged. She did tell me that she is still waiting for her fingerprints to be read and that she had to have them redone 3 or 4 times so I guess I am still ahead of the game compared to her. So I guess all in all it was good to get to talk with them. A friend did call me to tell me about a girl who was pregnant and was going to give up the baby (a boy by the way) but she is not sure where that process stands. I have learned not to get on the emotional roller coaster again...I think that's progress. We still have no idea where in the world our Mr. is but I do know this, God does. I try to keep myself reminded that he is indeed out there somewhere and just like God brought Steven and I together from across the country he can get our little boy to our home. Still believing that 2009 is the year of the baby. I am so grateful for all the people that continue to support our efforts and pray for our little boy. So for this day I will continue to wait....and build up vacation time. I will be able to take a good deal of time off when he gets here so that is good. So wherever you are little Mr. Zimmerman please know that your Mom and Dad are praying for you and waiting expectantly for your arrival and we love you already.

Hurry Up and Wait

Okay the process is slow slow slow. Part of the process for adoption if having your fingerprints done. We went to the police department and had our fingerprints done in May. After DHS receives the fingerprints it takes 4-8 weeks for the OSBI to run the prints to determine we are no child abusers and have no other unwanted criminal records....I guess our just saying we didn't have a record is not good enough. I really get that part. Not all people are honest. I have never had my fingerprints done digitally. The beauty of digital fingerprinting is that the fingerprints are always readable. Well at least that is what they told me. So imagine my surprise when I received a call saying my fingerprints didn't pass and they wanted to me to have them redone and this time I should have them done digitally. Okay yep you guessed it I already had that done. In retrospect I do remember the police officer having troubled getting the computer to accept my fingerprints. Wish I would have known then what I know now. Hindsight and all that. Anyway it was back to the police department to have them redone. This time all went smoothly and I was back to the DHS office to deliver my new set of prints. When I delivered the new print cards to the DHS I met with the nicest DHS worker, Teresa. (No last name used to protect the innocent) She assured me in spite of the fact that it was 4:15 and they went home at 4:30 she would get my new prints in the mail that day. That was May 28. We Teresa and I have a conversation every week. In fact I just spoke with her again today. Still no print results. Ugh! Oh by the way I failed to mention that Steven's prints went through without any problems and I was pleased to find he was not a hardened criminal. Well, I already knew that but the OSBI felt obligated to confirm that for us. So once again it is back to the waiting game. Everywhere we go it seems there are adorable little boys enjoying their life and our home continues without one. I have faith in God that our little boy is coming. Steven and I have been confessing for months that 2009 is the year of the baby. So keep up your prayer support that our little man is closer and closer everyday.

In The Beginning

Our family has engaged in an attempt to increase our family though the DHS adoption process. This blog is an effort to document our journey. We want to share this with all our friends and family and hopefully be able to create a way for our new family member to understand what we did and how we felt about the process of him coming into our family. We have been on an emotional roller coaster for the last year and as I start this I wonder why I didn't start it earlier in the process. Oh well can't undo the past. Why do we want to adopt? That is a question we have been asked often. I am 46 and at my age I sometimes ask myself the same thing, but I know that this is just part of God's plan for our lives.

OUR FAMILY:
Our family currently consists of myself, my husband Steven, our son Mark and his wife Brianna, our son Levon and our daughter Mariah. Oh I can't forget the 4 legged members of our family 2 Airedales (Elizabeth Taylor and Dutchess) and a giant Great Dane/Mastiff mix named Duke. They are just the sweetest dogs and they bring a great deal of joy to our family. Steven and I have been married 6 years now. We met online and a big city guy moved to a very small rural community and we became a new family.